Have you ever thought of someone and instantly he or she calls you on the telephone? Or how about this, you walk into a ballroom crowded with 2,000 people at a convention wishing you could find your friends, and suddenly you bump into them? Have you ever thought of a loved one who has passed away and wished he or she was still here, and then something happens that tells you loud and clear they are?
I don’t believe in coincidences or accidents; I think when we put our intentions out there, they’re heard. As my good friend Jana Stanfield says, coincidence is just God’s way of showing off! Well… God has been showing off a lot lately in my life.
A few weeks ago I emceed the first ever CampExperience, a three-day women’s retreat at Copper Mountain in Colorado designed for busy women to “getaway and get it.” Renew, refresh, and respond was the theme and two Colorado charities that help single mothers get off the streets and into stable housing were the recipients of almost $20,000 raised by the 150 women and corporate sponsors in attendance.
Homelessness has been a very sensitive issue for me after my family’s life was changed forever by an amazing single and homeless mother named Robin who walked into lives and hearts seven years ago. Only a few years before I met her, Robin was a top executive with one of Ross Perot’s companies, drove a Porsche, and lived in a nice house in California. After a few bad decisions, she lost everything and found herself on the streets with her 2-year-old son. Her story helped me realize how vulnerable we all are to homelessness.
Robin was all about connections and she taught me a lot about the power of the “network” on the streets. She refused to ever stay in a shelter with her son, and through her amazing networking talent she never had to take that chance. The old Volvo station wagon she drove and the apartment she lived in each happened because of people who “paid it forward” for Robin.
We lost Robin five years ago to leukemia. After she died, her 8-year-old son Rex asked me to donate Robin’s Volvo (the only possession she had worth more than $100) to someone who could really use it. He wanted to give it to a single mom with a son, who was struggling and really needed a car to move forward. Robin had taught him well.
I contacted Partners in Housing in Colorado Springs, Colorado and they identified a “partner” in their program who fit all the requirements Rex described. Due to confidentiality issues, we did not get to meet her but I received a letter three weeks later, forwarded by Partners in Housing, from the young mother who desperately needed that car to get to her job and to school so she could build a better life for herself and her son.
As I was looking over my script and getting ready for the sound check before CampExperience started, this beautiful young woman approached me holding Robin’s old very distinct silver key chain: I have never seen another key chain like it. As our teary eyes met, she introduced herself as the “partner” who received Robin’s Volvo five years ago. She kept Robin’s key chain to remind her to pray every day for Robin’s son Rex.
She had graduated from Partners in Housing, earned a master’s degree, and was now teaching high-risk children in Colorado Springs. She and her son were thriving; talk about perfecting connecting!
The best part was when she told me she had “paid it forward” by giving Robin’s old Volvo to another single, homeless mom who had entered the program and needed a car. Imagine that old Volvo changed the life of at least three homeless families and it’s still running!
Here are a few ideas to think about as you determine ways to “pay it forward” within your network:
Perfecting Connecting® Action Steps:
1. Believe in the power of positive intentions. It’s very simple. Declare what hopes, desires, and needs are for yourself and others, and then “dial it in” as Oprah Winfrey is famous for saying, and then watch what happens!
2. Look for opportunities to pay it forward with your network. Often it’s as simple as making a telephone call, sending an e-mail, or offering your time or expertise to help someone. It usually doesn’t cost money or much of your time to pay it forward, but the ramifications of your act will have the potential to reach beyond your wildest imagination; trust me.
3. Pay attention to intuitive nudges. Lynn Robinson, author of “Divine Intuition, Your Guide to Creating a Life You Love” (Dorling Kindersley 2001) says God can be a nag. If you’re supposed to carry out some divine idea or intervention, you won’t be able to shrug it off. You will see and hear the message loud and clear over and over again until you finally say, “uncle” and take action.
Rent the movie “Pay It Forward,” released in 2000 starring Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt. It will remind you how the world can be changed if we all made an effort to pay it forward.
Thanks Robin!